Sex is the second most common issue that couples argue about. Money is number one. The biggest complaint about sex in long-term relationships is the loss of desire, or the ebb in erotic longing for your partner over time.

All too often, once couples commit or marry and the responsibilities of life come into play, i.e. work, kids, bills, partners lose their erotic appeal. We often hear, “I love my partner but I am not ‘in love’ with him/her anymore. I lost the desire for him/her. He/She’s more like a roommate or a friend than a lover.”

Esther Perel in her book, Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence, identifies the dilemma facing committed couples – – How do you reconcile the need for reliability and steadiness in a loving relationship with the need for exhilaration and novelty of an erotic relationship? Esther Perel answers that question very well in her book.

Here is a video excerpt from one of her presentations on this topic. We think you will enjoy it.

Esther Perel: The secret to desire in a long-term relationship.

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