One of our favorite “Master Experts”, Tammy Nelson, Ph.D. spoke at the Psychotherapy Networker Symposium we recently attended. Dr. Nelson is an internationally known relationship and sex expert, speaker and author.

At our conference Tammy spoke about her newest book, When You’re the One Who Cheats: Ten Things You Need to Know.

Tammy presents a different perspective on infidelity, since there is much written for the person who was “cheated on,” but not much, if any, for the person who cheated. Some may think, “Of course there is help and guidance for the ‘victim’. They were the ones who were hurt. But the ones who broke their vows, perpetrated hurt upon their partners, don’t deserve to have guidance or help.” It’s so easy to judge and discount their needs.

Over the last 30 years, Bob and I have worked with many couples where there was infidelity and the couple was working towards healing their marriage. So we are working with both parties. And yes, the one who cheated and lied needs to own their choice and the impact it’s had on their partner. They are also good people who made mistakes, who struggle with their guilt and shame about their actions, and who are intensely distressed about the pain they’ve caused.

Here is a short video of Tammy discussing her latest book:

Tammy’s other books include:

The New Monogamy: Redefining Your Relationship After Infidelity – A guide to help couples define their respective definitions of monogamy, and provides guidance on how couples can regain trust and faith in their relationship after infidelity.

Getting the Sex You Want: Shed Your Inhibitions and Reach New Heights of Passion Together – An exploration of how couples can improve their communication about sex to increase emotional and erotic connection. Tammy proposes a list of exercises that partners can work through to create deeper intimacy and passion.

We’d love to hear your thoughts about Dr. Tammy Nelson’s work on our Facebook page.


Your relationship deserves the highest level of support. Relationship Experts, Bob and Lori Hollander are committed to helping individuals and couples build connection and deepen bonds in a world that often makes it difficult.

Call them at 410-363-2825 or email them today, info@relationshipswork.com.