How to Bring the Passion Back to Your Relationship

You never close your eyes anymore when I kiss your lips.And there's no tenderness like before in your fingertips.You're trying hard not to show it, (baby).But baby, baby I know it...You've lost that lovin' feeling,Whoa, that lovin' feeling,You've lost that lovin' feeling,Now it's gone...gone...gone...wooooooh.- The Righteous Brothers------------------------------------------------------------Have you and your partner lost that loving feeling?If so, you are not alone. Most couples lose the passion in relationships after the first few years.We most commonly hear:

• I love him, but I’m not 'in love'
• The attraction’s gone
• We’re more like roommates
• We haven’t had sex in months
• He wants sex but I’m not interested
• She said no so many times, I stopped asking
• He doesn’t kiss me anymore
• I’m too tired for sex

So why is this inevitable? Part of the problem is we didn’t read our relationship manual telling us the fire will burn out if we don’t tend to it. Most newlyweds don’t realize passion will die if the flames are not stoked. Then, of course, there are the endless responsibilities making it difficult to relax: work, kids, stress, cleaning, shopping, cooking, carpool, kids’ activities, bills and the never-ending to-do list. Add to that our tendency to live unconsciously by falling into routines and being complacent, and you end up with a relationship where you take each other for granted, drift apart emotionally, stop doing the little things, forget to create romance, stop kissing and become increasingly irritated by the little things you can’t stand about your partner. Before you know it, you’ve lost those lovin’ feelings.The good news is that it doesn’t have to be that way. You can spark the embers right this very minute! Begin by doing the little things that create connection, intimacy and love. Ask yourself, what action(s) will make your partner feel loved? Could it be...words of gratitude, a loving touch, a gift, a note, a surprise, a night out, a warm hug? Do it now, if you can, so the moment doesn't get away from you.Remember.... Intimacy and passion are created by the small acts of love we do every day.Need more ideas? There are lots of great books with ideas on creating intimacy, passion, love and eroticism in your relationship.Here are the ones we like best: