How fast do you drive on a date?

Every new relationship begins with a journey down what we call Relationship Highway (a.k.a. the Road to Commitment). As those of you who read our Relate 360° article of the month may know, there are five stops on Relationship Highway: Heaven, Re-Entry, Earth School, Graduation and Commitment. While we defined each stop along the way to your final destination (a lasting relationship) in our article, we didn't talk about one key factor in getting there: The speed limit.In other words, how fast should you drive down Relationship Highway?While it's true that some relationships sky rocket all the way to commitment in a matter of a few short months, many new relationships crash if either partner or both start out with their pedal to the metal. But why can it be so difficult to slow down?Besides the fact that our hormones are often in the driver's seat initially, there's also a cultural factor at play: We live in an extremely fast world. We eat fast food, we fly across the country in mere hours, we have instant messaging, we can even get the latest news before it hits broadcast on TV. Everyone is wired to expect fast answers and fast action in all aspects of life - even in dating.Our "fast" society has us exploring sexual intimacy before we even know if we like the person we are dating. It has us moving in together before we are ready to make a real commitment. We can end up investing a lot of ourselves in someone we don’t actually want to spend our life with.So, here’s the point – and the paradox: If we slow down in the beginning, we’re not only more likely to make better relationship decisions in general, but we’ll also (ultimately) speed things up. The reason? By traveling at the posted speed limit in the beginning, we give ourselves a chance to be certain – and, therefore, we can make decisions and act more quickly.Of course, there’s a secondary benefit to going slow. We get to savor each stop along Relationship Highway as long as possible. Very few of us would give up feeling that first flush of love just to get to the end game. Or, forgo the excitement of a new relationship just to have a ring around our finger now. Looking back, we might even wish we had made “the beginning” last a lot longer.So what’s the rush? You want to give yourself the best chance of getting to the final stop on Relationship Highway with the right person in the passenger seat. And the best way to ensure that is to go slow enough to be able to see the scenery.Do you drive over the speed limit when dating? What do you do to slow things down?Share your stories and thoughts with us on our Facebook page.